Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
