we're chasing vodka with high fives
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
