Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
