Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
