I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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