'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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