he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
