I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
