i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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