how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
