just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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