He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Are we still banned from the library?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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