But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
