No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize
