I got chris browned last night
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
