GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
