Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
