were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
last night I used snow as a chaser
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
