I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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