im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
