well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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