Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
