just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Can you repeat that, but with context?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
there is puke in my bra ... again
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