ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
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