Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
