No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
