that's an acceptable place to lick
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
