Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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