It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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