Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize
