thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
