Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
