I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize