I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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