Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
