He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
