maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
