i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
