My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
