Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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