oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
what day is it and did you see me today?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize