spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
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