Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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