Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
