just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
