What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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