I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
You took a bar mat shot.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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