i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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