It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
