I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
